Bleh

Bleh pretty much sums up the way I have felt for the past week or so. I haven't worked out at all so that is probably why I feel this way. At first I didn't go swim because my goggles broke and it was a few days before I could get to Academy to get another pair. Then I was too busy running errands like grocery store and Target. I'd say " I'll go after I finish this load of laundry" and then before I knew it it was time to go to work. I need to get off this roller coaster of emotions!

I wander from room to room in this apartment and get more and more depressed. Every room has a pile of mess! Bathroom=dirty. Kitchen=dirty. Laundry piled up on spare couch ready to be folded. The master bedroom I share with Kellan has toys strewn everywhere and her bed is a pile of stuffed animals. Every night when I go to bed my bed has her discarded clothes from the day as well as random pencil crayons, tape, and whatever else she was drawing with.

I need more hours in the day. Or I need to become more scheduled. I try to sit and fold clothes but then I remember I have to delete some emails and oh I haven't been on FB in a couple of days, and then there is the book for book club I've only read two chapters so far. And then I need to clip coupons and plan the meals for the week.

I just want to run away sometimes!

OK, so I rode the stationary bike for 4 miles today, and my legs feel like rubber! God this is going to be a long journey!

I did not want to go to the Y at all today since I woke up with a slight headache and just felt sluggish. But then I remembered that I had gone to JC Penny and the mall yesterday with the kids and saw all these cute clothes! I really want to wear cute clothes and not feel weird wearing them, and I want to be able to wear shorts this summer! And the kicker was when I weighed myself and I haven't lost a single pound since last week! So I threw my workout clothes on and went to the Y.

Once I got there I felt better knowing I was doing something good for myself. Once I got on the bike my own personal sense of competition kicked in and I kept riding until my legs protested. I started out on the treadmill to warm up and did that for 10 minutes at a pretty good pace. At that point I switched to the bike. The Y has these really cool stationary bikes that have monitors on them and you can ride in the redwoods or along the beach or other trails, and you can listen to music! Listening to Ozzy Osborne really gets your blood going and makes me ride faster!

Tomorrow I plan on swimming again. I swam last Friday and completed 200 yards. Tomorrow I will try and swim just a little longer.

This is a weird journey cuz the more I work out the more I realise just how out of shape I am, yet I feel better each time I do it.